Dear Senior Opupulepu,
How are you do? I hope you are do fine just as I and all my shordies are do fine, fine.
Senior, I believe you must know Efo Koku the Bull, I am referring to that guy man, who was at Onupowuraa Nana Ontiaobiara’s corner, when he was in that epic boxing match against the Great Leopard, for the rank, title and position of Ogyakrom Omanhene.
Senior, this guy man, seeing fiili, fiili how Onapowuraa was receiving blows, left, right, center, top, down and backwards, continued lying to our ex-Omanhene that he was comfortably leading on all the judges’ cards.
Senior, leading where? One may ask, because Onapowuraa was not seeing anything except all the stars combined in the Milky Way Galaxy and he started naming them one by one.
Senior, the truth is Korku wanted Onapowuraa to be beaten up beyond repairs, so that in the next contest for the omanhene position, he would put up his name to be considered. After all, if Togbe Xornametor could be Omanhene, he too Efo Korku, too can be, since that too must pass.
Senior, unfortunately for Korku, one of the numerous side-chicks of the former omanhene, saw into this. To her, Onapowuraa beyond aid, as in being beaten up beyond repairs that nothing can be done to revive him, would render him a non-performing asset, and that cannot happen.
Senior, this side chick went all the way to Opera Square and bought a beautiful obroniwawu towel and went straight back to the boxing arena and threw the towel to Onapowuraa, to wipe his face and throw it down so that Papa Referee would stop the fight. And this was what exactly happened and to this day Korku the Bull has vowed to teach that side chick the month in which they manufacture momoni, as in koobi’s senior cousin.
Senior, Korku the Bull has been sad before, during and after that fight, where Nana Owuobiayeowuo, beat up Onapowuraa as if he was a small boy caught tearing some people’s mango in their garden.
Senior, the sadness quality of Korku the Bull originated from the day Omanhene Atadwe Milk, decided he had had enough with ewiase especially the people of Ogyakrom, and so stowaway on the next available train going to the Kingdom of Yahweh.
Senior, you see Nana Atadwe Milk, had promised some old sweater, woollen cap with long end, large size towel and Mansa Musa’s shorts lookalike, which were all obroniwawu. These costumes would surely make Korku, a brown cap elder in his hamlet.
Senior, Nana Atadwe Milk told him to come to his palace and collect the gifts the following morning, but forgetting that he promised someone something, immediately Nana Atadwe Milk saw the train stopping and loading, he quickly got on board and ascended to Heaven without even saying, bye-bye.
Senior, since then, Korku has never been himself. He started fighting Nana Atadwe Milk’s family members and telling them if they never knew, he was telling them that he was the last son of the late omanhene. And this he can prove in Judge Lauren Lake’s Paternity Court. But when he was called to go to give samples at DNA diagnostics, he refused to go.
Senior, still not accepting that Nana Atadwe Milk had gone to join his ancestors, Efo Korku the Bull is now demanding the late Omanhene’s certificate of demerit, the certificate those who decide they are going to join the ancestors in the life hereafter are deservingly given. Whatever Korku is going to do with the demerit certificate, you and I cannot tell.
Senior, in order to evade the question about the whereabouts of the demerit certificate of Nana Atadwe Milk, his brother Samson, came to accuse Korku the Bull that he had gone into the tomb of the late Omanhene and removed his body for rituals.
In fact, Samson went on to say that, Korku’s family would meet soon to choose a family head, which is true, though and that is the position Korku has been eyeing ever since his side-chick threw him out on the side of the road and chose a certain ancient man, who was a family head, to become her sweetie muah-muah.
Senior, Korku the Bull was shocked, because even though he did shrine things before, it was only on two occasions, one to pass exams he had never studied for and the other to win over a beautiful lady.
Senior, in the first case, Korku was asked to sleep in a cemetery for seven days and make sushi out of lizard and frog meat and eat gently and swallow without making faces. He was brave enough and did all that, but when the results of all the examinations he took came, he failed portor. In fact, in some of the papers, the angry examiners gave him negative figures, so that whenever he decided to rewrite, the marks he will get, would be added to the negative figures to show his smoothness level.
Senior, in the second case, he was made to pound fufu at a bush canteen for one whole moon, made to sweep the markets for one whole moon and made to scrub gutters and drainages also for one whole moon. And as if that was not enough, he was made to wash the garments of three hundred fitters, kaaya men, as in head porters and borla car operators for one moon. This, Korku the Bull did, but the chick, who did not even take notice of him, went reciting Hail Mary, Hail Mary and took to enter a convent. Today she is called Rev. Sr…, sorry I will not disclose her name to you.
Senior, since then, Korku the Bull, has vowed never to go near anything fetish and so to be accused by Samson, the brother of Nana Atadwe Milk of sending the late Omanhene’s body somewhere, made Korku angry, mad and he cried.
Senior, some ex-member of the Roman Katholici group of worshippers of Yesu Chritus Emmanuel, who is now a founder of a born-again, die-again, resurrected again, gang of worshippers, said he was called up to Yahweh’s Kingdom for an urgent meeting, which if he did attend, there was nothing Yahweh could do to resolve a certain problem.
Senior, this pastor/prophet said that during Other Matters a certain angel told the meeting that our late Omanhene Atadwe Milk was taken up into Heaven, body and soul, so any one who visited his grave side would have to know that the living cannot be found among the dead.
Senior, as for me, I think the family of Nana Atadwe Milk should just give Korku the Bull all that the late omanhene promised to give him before he died. Korku only want to chop this family head thing and become a respected title elder in the community. After all, all those things are obroniwawu.
Senior, I am Dan, sorry I am Done.
It’s Me!
